Why Can't I Run... & Fitness Revelations

So let me explain the first part of the title... Its not that I can't physically run, I can, I have been properly for a little while now; but why can't I run WITHOUT people staring at me (my tits) as I run.

It makes me feel like I'm some sort of show, and its horrible! I just want to make myself feel good by going for a run, to help me lose weight and get fit - but I can't without a load of people staring at my bouncing bosoms.

And let me just justify here too... It isn't just men, I'm not slamming men at all, but women stare at me too! Both are as bad as each other, and both make me feel like my boobs are an attraction and they have a right to stare at them... which they do not.

Now for the other part... my fitness revelations. I've always, and I mean always, hated doing

fitness/exercise in public or near other people. If I went to my old gym, I'd go at a time where there is no one around, and I mean no one, the only person is the 2 Personal Trainers and the receptionist.

But since doing my short little road runs a few times a week, I've never (touch wood) yet had anyone laugh at me for going for a run. If anything I've had people say nice things to me; for example...

"Keep going, you're doing great!"

"Work Hard, Get rewards... you're great girl!"

And it's been a total wake-up call that people haven't laughed at me, and my attempt at running. If anything people are happy I'm making an effort.

I just want to clarify as I'm going to write a little more about my lifestyle changes and healthy eating (notice I said healthy eating, NOT a diet!) that I'm doing this for myself, my health and my fitness. This isn't to benefit anyone but myself.

I currently feel a bit horrible in my body at the moment, and I'm not going to get skinny, that isn't my aim. I just want to be fit, healthy and able to do a few more things which may have suppressed me in the past and to feel happy and comfortable in my body. I'm not getting skinny, so please pretty please don't have that rant at me!!

Emma Victoria

xox

Being a "Plus Size"...

This has been bugging me for a little while now... 

Yes I'm plus size.

and Yes... Men are attracted to me!!!!!!!

Honestly, the amount of times people put me down for my size and not being a size 10 doesn't bother me but what does bother me is when they think men won't be attracted to me because I'm a bigger girl.

I've battled with my weight for many years now - and only since I've started modelling have I started to learn to accept it. And since accepting it, my confidence has grown by 1000%!

But (there's always a but isn't there...) everytime I hear other people say "She's pretty but if she lost 'this much' weight then she'd get a man no problem" - I DO NOT NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT TO FIND A MAN.

Honestly, my love life isn't exactly the worst - yes I may well be single right now, but I've started dating again and seeing people! People also seem to think that I won't be able to "pull" an attractive guy because I'm not that slim... WRONG. You can't say all guys have the same taste for women, as the same for women with men and women and women and men and men and so on - you just can't!

Since dressing in this style, I get littered with compliments all the time but the most common one has to be "How do you get the confidence to wear these sort of clothes?" I didn't and sometimes I still get a bit worried if I'm pushing the boundaries too far for my figure... But why should it matter how I dress to the rest of the world! 

I know this is a kind of ranty post, but I just want people to understand that I am a human being just like everyone else, and I do sometimes get a little hurt by rude comments, whether you mean them or not. 

Another little note I'd like to add, as I still find many people at my college and sometimes even my friends think that looks are the thing that attracts you to a person - they are only a small factor, obviously you have to like the way a person looks in your eyes (not everyone is Marilyn Monroe y'know) but personality is also attractive. 


Lots of Love

Emma Victoria

xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoox